tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post7501645372932001110..comments2023-05-02T01:13:15.498-07:00Comments on Grace Undressed: the hobbyistGracehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13246990884639753146noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-52248745436538739302012-06-13T13:35:49.769-07:002012-06-13T13:35:49.769-07:00Every "relationship" in one way or anoth...Every "relationship" in one way or another has a cost. We all make choices, working in jobs where we like or dislike the employer. The providers serve a service that is needed. As long as the choice to work is of free will then live and let live.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-35305836133611109752009-06-24T08:12:42.862-07:002009-06-24T08:12:42.862-07:00I am new to this blog, but I must say that I like ...I am new to this blog, but I must say that I like it quite a lot. It's a funny thing about the kind of topics that get raised in such a forum. Once you put aside the folks who are just plain angry about a real or imagined slight form the opposite sex, or are deeply disgruntled at the general balance of power among the sexes, you tend to find people who are at least attempting to find out what makes themselves and others tick. <br /><br />Full disclosure: I have paid for sex. I have gone to strip bars. I have had some interesting, and from my perspective, quite real (even emotionally raw, in a good sense) relationships with people I have met in clubs. I have also been married (ultimately unsuccessfully) and am a great father to a teenage son. In short, no angel, but not a devil either.<br /><br />That said, I found myself put off by Jim and his transparent need for control coupled with his own neediness. I know the Glass Slipper in Boston, and I am sure I have seen operators like Jim there. But, I imagine that I too (no, I am certain that I too) have played the same game; trying to persuade a girl I don't know at all that we have more in common that she suspects! <br /><br />I certainly recognize the desire to "save" a girl– what person who has walked into this world doesn't. It isn't flattering to read that script back, even if the voice, tone, and circumstances are different.<br /><br />Anyway, perhaps more later. But the author of this blog is a great writer (as many have already noted) and it is a sudden and unexpected pleasure to read. Quel surprise! MerciAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-90342153024594950532009-06-15T22:25:45.586-07:002009-06-15T22:25:45.586-07:00im glad i dont have to pay for sex. jim's life...im glad i dont have to pay for sex. jim's life sounds depressing. but i guess its guys like that that keeps the [stripper] business going. <br /><br />convince me to subscribe to your services :) i would just do it for fun ... oops convinced myselfAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06459531534678865422noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-12871837091479034662009-06-12T04:11:57.219-07:002009-06-12T04:11:57.219-07:00@Mitch: It's not annoying. But I'm like Fr...@Mitch: It's not annoying. But I'm like Frank -- if someone says they're concerned for me my knee-jerk response is to say I'm OK. :)Gracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13246990884639753146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-56885495524256400432009-06-11T17:42:50.004-07:002009-06-11T17:42:50.004-07:00Yes. Sometimes paying me to keep my opinion to mys...Yes. Sometimes paying me to keep my opinion to myself can be very, very expensive.Gracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13246990884639753146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-20565921924142167212009-06-11T13:52:41.296-07:002009-06-11T13:52:41.296-07:00Does that cost extra? Or are you allowed to discou...Does that cost extra? Or are you allowed to discount it?<br /><br />Sorry. This was getting way too serious. But interesting.Frankhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01640031109014198835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-14545199333922787802009-06-11T12:46:29.367-07:002009-06-11T12:46:29.367-07:00"And you seem perturbed by the concept of a m..."And you seem perturbed by the concept of a man like Jim that pays women for sex?"<br /><br />If you would actually READ the other parts of the blog, she makes her opinions about prostitution perfectly clear. Besides, this entry isn't a judgment on all johns and pimps everywhere - it's a character study on a guy that sounds like he might be at least a little like you.<br /><br /><br />"I'm with Jim in the view that any woman that compromises her morality by exchanging time, intimacy, her body, etc for money is not worth the effort for a regular relationship of any kind."<br /><br />My only response to this is get over yourself, tool.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-24885139028532275642009-06-11T07:29:45.088-07:002009-06-11T07:29:45.088-07:00I was thinking about safety when I first read abou...I was thinking about safety when I first read about private dancing, too. In a situation where a man who might feel entitled is alone in private with a woman who has a pretty good chance of not being believed, because it is so easy to<br />manipulate a jury into doubting a woman's credibility, it seems like there would be potential for something to go wrong.<br /><br />But hopefully your screening is good and you'll always be safe.<br /><br />Is it annoying when people worry about you like that?Mitchnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-22760290649438558782009-06-10T05:24:09.334-07:002009-06-10T05:24:09.334-07:00Thanks to everyone for making all the good points ...Thanks to everyone for making all the good points already. <br /><br />I'll say this one more time: I have no problem with "guys who pay for sex" nor with "prostitutes" -- a term which, while not technically correct, I will happily assume for the purposes of this conversation. <br /><br />I have always tried see people as people and not in categories, regardless of the place or the circumstance under which I meet them. That said, I like some better than others. <br /><br />Some men who are frequent patrons of adult providers seems to develop the delusion that they're providers do not have a right to an opinion about them. Sorry. You can't pay somebody not to have an opinion; you can only pay them not to tell you about it.Gracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13246990884639753146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-56746698867732680132009-06-09T15:35:59.598-07:002009-06-09T15:35:59.598-07:00I find it telling that he assumes it's a moral...I find it telling that he assumes it's a moral compromise for any particular woman. A moral compromise can only be defined as such by the person doing the compromising...Vincenthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11990376709314557533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-54258356625404870262009-06-09T13:17:12.106-07:002009-06-09T13:17:12.106-07:00I was just going to ask why he reads this blog if ...I was just going to ask why he reads this blog if it pisses him off so much, but I like your answers too. I also liked - <br /><br />"You might accept my love and caring today in exchange for a relationship."<br /><br />I think it's just the rates that he objects to because based on the post, I wouldn't give him more than 5 - 10 bucks for any of those things.Mister Bluehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05312804821469306792noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-150140937879765622009-06-09T11:30:41.946-07:002009-06-09T11:30:41.946-07:00@12:23 "Any woman who exchanges her time...fo...@12:23 "Any woman who exchanges her time...for money is not worth the effort of a regular relationship." You are kidding, right? Or is every woman who works for a living now a whore? <br /><br />Also, I think it's interesting that you chastise the writer for judging men who pay for sex, while you yourself judge the women who sell it.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-32792232209731219302009-06-09T11:07:01.583-07:002009-06-09T11:07:01.583-07:00"...any woman that compromises her morality b..."...any woman that compromises her morality by exchanging time, intimacy, her body, etc for money is not worth the effort for a regular relationship of any kind."<br /><br />in other words, every woman that ever married before women could own property or hold jobs or inherit money of their own? and even now, women who'd like to marry a man with money, so they can afford to not work and raise their children, instead?<br /><br />they're all prostitutes by your narrow, misogynistic (and not just a little envious) description.<br /><br />i'm thrilled you won't be wanting a relationship with any of those women, because who would want a relationship with a woman-hater like you? ugh. you disgust me. go crawl back underneath the Neanderthal rock you emerged from.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16144846499952251826noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-20196933194361752782009-06-09T00:23:27.355-07:002009-06-09T00:23:27.355-07:00You get naked in tubs with men paying you, crawl u...You get naked in tubs with men paying you, crawl under sheets to hold and be held but only if money is involved and have a clock ticking in your head regarding the time spent with them?<br /><br />And you seem perturbed by the concept of a man like Jim that pays women for sex?<br /><br />I'm with Jim in the view that any woman that compromises her morality by exchanging time, intimacy, her body, etc for money is not worth the effort for a regular relationship of any kind.<br /><br />Face it. You are a prostitute. <br /><br />You might accept my love and caring today in exchange for a relationship but I'll always remember how cheap those things were for others in your past.<br /><br />$500 may be chump change for the guy paying you and you are selling your flesh at that time for what might be a lot of money to you but the equivalent of loose change to us. Who is laughing then?<br /><br />I think this guy is getting exactly what her wants in a manner that works for him. <br /><br />I think you are maybe being a little bitter and looking back on the time you spent listening to him and not getting paid now when you can't make the kind of money you dreamed of.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-53988972567504299002009-06-06T21:30:46.859-07:002009-06-06T21:30:46.859-07:00Telekinetic rochambeau? Cool...Telekinetic rochambeau? Cool...Vincenthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11990376709314557533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-83193142274057442882009-06-06T14:37:17.382-07:002009-06-06T14:37:17.382-07:00As you should be. Don't you know I can kick yo...As you should be. Don't you know I can kick you in the nuts with my mind?<br /><br />:D<br /><br />XOXO,<br />GraceGracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13246990884639753146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-20500809616535334862009-06-06T10:12:55.687-07:002009-06-06T10:12:55.687-07:00Fair enough. There's no sense arguing against...Fair enough. There's no sense arguing against contentment, but I think the "real thing" is only garbage when it's not the real thing. It may not be welcome or returned, just as the simple desire to have sex might not, but a similar standard of discretion doesn't invalidate exclusivity. If it did, your stated ability to distinguish the two would be unnecessary. The literal, dictionary definition of "real" isn't good enough for me, but my interpretation is exclusive to me, I suppose.<br /><br />But this argument is purely academic. I'm pretty sure I'm afraid of you now.Mister Bluehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05312804821469306792noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-78464150518046576792009-06-06T07:59:20.869-07:002009-06-06T07:59:20.869-07:00I think I'm actually not bad at distinguishing...I think I'm actually not bad at distinguishing pick-up lines from the real thing. Not that they are mutually exclusive, either. The desire to get in someone's pants is as real as anything, and doesn't always indicate a lack of respect; the "real thing" can be complete garbage. <br /><br />I'm not going to fall into bed with everyone who has "real feelings" anymore than I'm going to fall for everybody with a good pick-up line. I fall for guys who smell right and make me laugh, and there isn't much they can do about either of those things.Gracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13246990884639753146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-1628228445545073952009-06-05T19:21:30.720-07:002009-06-05T19:21:30.720-07:00I'm not saying they don't. I just resent ...I'm not saying they don't. I just resent the fact that genuine feelings and opinions are shrugged off due to the guys who use them as pick up lines. It's kind of like having an older sibling who screwed up so much that it made your parents extra cautious and strict with you. <br /><br />Maybe he really is concerned for your safety, but it doesn't seem consistent with a guy you describe as preferring naive, table-tending hookers over the one thousand and one other flavors to choose from. <br /><br />And why do I get the feeling that your "irritating" qualities are actually kind of endearing?Mister Bluehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05312804821469306792noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-71665138838712350602009-06-05T19:03:37.056-07:002009-06-05T19:03:37.056-07:00Oh, please. I'd venture that virtually all of ...Oh, please. I'd venture that virtually all of the men who have become my regular clients have seen me for something more than a piece of ass. I can't imagine they would spend the time and money they have spent on an interchangeable piece of anatomy when there are equally attractive pieces of anatomy out there that are far cheaper and far less irritating. <br /><br />Thing is, I see them as people, too. Sometimes what I see is flattering, and sometimes it isn't. That's all.Gracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13246990884639753146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-47103085742673025582009-06-05T17:55:56.215-07:002009-06-05T17:55:56.215-07:00Yeah, the guy who sees you as more than just a pie...Yeah, the guy who sees you as more than just a piece of ass. He's really interested in you as a person. Classic, and comical, considering the context, but sad as well, given what it does to some girls. I'm not surprised that you've become so businesslike and at arms length with people. Hopefully,it doesn't extend beyond your profession.Mister Bluehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05312804821469306792noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-61293460268061041132009-06-05T14:18:44.638-07:002009-06-05T14:18:44.638-07:00Apparently your empathy space is contagious. I...Apparently your empathy space is contagious. I'm in a daze after reading this...Vincenthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11990376709314557533noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-39028099948642175502009-06-05T03:29:07.039-07:002009-06-05T03:29:07.039-07:00Dear God!
I AM an escort. And I make sure to scre...Dear God!<br /><br />I AM an escort. And I make sure to screen creeps and assholes like him out. There is this category of men who pray on less confident and newer women, and I tell them exactly what I think of them whenever I run into them on boards - although that happens rarely, since they know to avoid me.<br /><br />But overall, if you are successful as escort, you screen your clients not just for your physical safety but for sanity as well. This kind of bullshit is enough to put the guy on the blacklist for half the other escorts I know. Unfortunately, there is also another half... and I don't know how to realistically change this awful balance.<br /><br />Ingrid NevinAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-7690406417332806402009-06-04T22:12:07.732-07:002009-06-04T22:12:07.732-07:00that guy is a narcissist, so filled with shame, he...that guy is a narcissist, so filled with shame, he's shameless, which is why you get that strong nosefull of "fragile ego" off of him. and of course narcissists are lousy pimps, because they lack empathy, so they are careless with others. i'm glad you took a big giant pass on the guy.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16144846499952251826noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20440617.post-31558626256972640702009-06-04T10:33:13.129-07:002009-06-04T10:33:13.129-07:00If we were all less afraid of being shot down, we&...If we were all less afraid of being shot down, we'd all be getting more action. Far easier said than done though. Damn it.Moosehttp://www.mooseinthekitchen.comnoreply@blogger.com